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	George W. Bush
	"The most important job is not to be governor, or first lady in my case."-Pella, Iowa, as quoted by the San Antonio Express-News, Jan. 30, 2000

	Random Quote
	"The word "genius" isn't applicable in football. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein." — Joe Theisman, NFL football quarterback and sports analyst

	Snapple Facts
	#131 Penguins have an organ above their eyes that converts seawater to freshwater. #132 A crocodile cannot move its tongue.

	Yo Mama ...
	is so short every time she farts, she blows sand in her shoes

	One Liners
	Q: What is a lesbian dinosaur called? A: A Lickalotapuss.

Most Recent
	Airport Security Those box cutters are dangerous ... 11.21.2009 I Smell Trouble This will go down in the history books ... 11.19.2009 Please Leave A Message. Now, which call do you suppose he'll answer first? ... 11.17.2009 A Sexual Perception Well, he's right . . . but not exactly what he has ... 11.14.2009

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Section Features
	Top Ranked Items

One Year Ago
	I Had An Uncle Who Said He Was Going To Come Back As A Bicycle Seat... He used a unique cologne so I always check for it. ... 11.22.2008 Honesty In The Pageants... would be really refreshing. Lol. ... 11.21.2008 This Get My... mouth to waterin' already. ... 11.20.2008 He Doesn't Suffer From Premature Ejaculation... SHE does! ... 11.19.2008

Two Years Ago
	When Men Serve Thanksgiving Dinner Of course this is the edited version ... 11.22.2007 Airport X-Ray Don't you just hate it when this happens? ... 11.21.2007 Her New Do I think he likes it. ... 11.20.2007 What Is Thanksgiving I think this is the same answer they used on Jeopardy. ... 11.19.2007

Lookie Here!
	The Spy Who Shagged Me

	Casino Joke
	I know this crazy guy who just won't play at a casino. He just pretends to play in his head. Last week he lost his mind!

	Goofball Facts
	Carnivorous animals will not eat another animal that has been hit by a lightning strike.